[Image from Tumblr]
By: Gabriela Yareliz
A happy Sunday morning to you! French election, round one, kicks off. I need to find a minute today and whip out some stationery and write to Madame about our election concerns. I think I will wait until I see who dominated in this premier tour. Participation is at an all time low, in terms of voter turn out. The rest of us are praying today puts a halt on Marine Le Pen– but enough about politics. I will keep refreshing my Le Figaro app.
Spring in NYC is hesitant. It comes, and it goes. The other day, I was thinking about where I was at this time last year. So much has changed.
I was deeply disappointed with some professional aspects of my life (this year, I am disappointed with different aspects, ha!). Things have gotten better, though. This year, I was able to pull out of that funk that felt like post-bar exam depression. I felt like I had lost myself in the process of obtaining my license. But that is a different post, for another day. Today, I am certainly more seasoned at this point in the job– starting my third year in August. And I am becoming the attorney I wanted to be.
I was so giddy about my birthday, last year. This year, I am excited, but at some points, I feel like my birthday crept up on me. I keep forgetting I will be one year older, soon. This is very unlike my old countdown ways.
I am still working on the self-care aspect of life. I am getting back in shape and learning that ‘No’ is a complete sentence.
As weak as I may feel sometimes, I can still say that I have grown stronger. I deal with trauma every day and people who are unstable mentally, and this is not easy. I am learning I need to be less harsh with myself.
My style has changed, slightly. There are a lot less H&M $5 sweaters in my closet. The last ones got weird and the cheap fabric gave out, so I threw them out and never replaced them. This year, I stepped foot in stores I had never gone into.
I do celebrate my successful adulting, even if there is a tinge of lack of balance in some areas. Long work days are followed by nice walks and ice cream with my boyfriend. Soon, I will be hitting the pavement again (long runs on the promenade).
I stopped listening to my favorite radio show in the mornings. I don’t know when it happened. I just realized the other day that the show I never missed for 5 years no longer impressed me or made me laugh. I just realized I haven’t listened to it in two months. Strange.
I went to bed hungry last night, because I was flipping through recipes that I was going to make today. Food 52 is an amazing website for recipes. I can’t wait to start on that.
It’s early still. I am still in bed. The day is sunny and bright, unlike yesterday’s rain. I worked on a motion last night, so today is mine.
This is one of my favorite things about this year versus last year– Sundays are mine, and they are spent in my sunny kitchen.
Where were you, last year? What has changed? Some of you are stronger. Some of you are one step closer to graduation. Some of you are getting married. Celebrate the changes! Some of you may be in the middle of something that is awful and feels never ending. I am telling you, it won’t last forever. Stay focused; have vision and keep pushing forward. Someday, your Sundays will be yours, so to speak.
Lastly, I wanted to share some inspiration I collected from things I read recently:
“May God bless you with a restless discomfort about easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships, so that you may boldly apply the truth of Christ and love as he loved from deep within your heart.
May God bless you with holy anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people, so that you may work for peace, justice and freedom and demonstrate that true peace comes only in Christ.
May God bless you with the gift of tears to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation, or the loss of all that they cherish, so that you might comfort them and, in so doing, point them to the Great Comforter, Jesus Christ, the only One who truly transforms sorrow into joy.
May God bless you with enough faith to believe that you really can make a difference in this world, so that you are able, with God’s grace in Christ, to do what otherwise could not be done.”
– A Franciscan Blessing adapted by Dr. Lindsay Fikkert
“So long as you write what you wish to write, that is all that matters; and whether it matters for ages or only for hours, nobody can say.”
– Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own
“We all have different reasons for forgetting to breathe.”
– Andrea Gibson
“The pen is mightier than the sword, but only in retrospect. At the time of combat, those with the swords generally win.” Margaret Atwood, The Nation
The wise Margaret Atwood… I believe in the power of the pen, deeply. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t leave all of my scribbles for the world to read.
I hope you also learn to record the painful and the joyous things in life. Yours is a journey that should never be forgotten.